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strange grabdparents
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strange grabdparents
3 June 2009, 1:33 PM
 Edited by pippa 3 June 2009, 3:31 PM
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pippa
Joined 13 May 2009
47 posts
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Sorry, it should have said Grandparents! Can anyone please answer me this question one set of grandkids get there conformation outfits paid for, others get £20 to £40 each on xmas presents , me i got a 50p book as a xmas present . All the other kids are still seeing and getting stuff from them i havent seen , heard or had anything from them in over 25 years is this fair? my "grandmother" died a few weeks ago and never apologised should i go to her grave if only to dance on it ??!
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i WILL start the diet tomorrow but...?
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strange grabdparents
5 June 2009, 0:47 AM
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Nobby
Joined 26 Feb 2007
6188 posts
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omg i get this with my kids..hell, i get it with me!! I have a sister, dropped out of college, has never done well, had nervous breakdown just coz she had a child and couldnt cope...yet i left home at 16, looked after myself, raised my kids well, finished college etc etc - my sister gets bunches of flowers from my dad, and expensive food treats. I get a carrier bag full of baked beans/tins!! "coz thats wot im used to..!!" Her child gets pressies all the time, yet she never bothers to even return my dad's phonecalls - my kids, lucky to even get a birthday card. He even bought my HUSBAND an easter egg "coz he likes them" and me nothing - im the daughter, supposedly, not my husband!!
GRRR, does my head in. I have nothing to do with them now.
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strange grabdparents
5 June 2009, 9:35 AM
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pippa
Joined 13 May 2009
47 posts
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they played there kids of against each other and then the grandkids. what is going on in there heads do they not understand how much it hurts or do they just not care ? i gave up bothering a long time ago. if thats "what your used to " its only cos they started it . maybe theres a bit of jelousey because you dont need them as much as they would like.
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i WILL start the diet tomorrow but...?
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strange grabdparents
6 June 2009, 7:58 PM
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Nobby
Joined 26 Feb 2007
6188 posts
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nah its coz i married a farmer, which my parents felt was beneath them..whereas my sister married someone who was a manager (even though he was sacked from his first job for stealing etc) but he was at management level so he gets full respect from my family who think the sun shines out of his backside..therefore any offspring will obviously be much better than mine, added to which, we had girls and they sired a boy - which is obviously much better than us!!
Their loss not mine, i dont need that kind of influence on my girls anyway!
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Love me..Love my animals! :-p
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strange grabdparents
7 June 2009, 2:30 PM
Edited by pippa 7 June 2009, 2:33 PM
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pippa
Joined 13 May 2009
47 posts
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nothing wrong with a hard working farmer at least hes not a thief! why is it having a boy is being better than having girls with some people? leave them to there own devices in the end they will realise what they are missing. when they get too old at least you wont have to house them your wonderful sibling and there other half can take care of them!!!!!!!!!!!!!! lets see where the sun shines then!!!!!!
parents and grandparents cant live with them cant off them for the inheritence either!!!
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i WILL start the diet tomorrow but...?
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strange grabdparents
7 June 2009, 8:20 PM
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pc
Joined 6 Nov 2007
259 posts
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Hi....I'm the other way round...we have 3 boys..hubbys sister has 2girls...myinlaws were all over our kids wen they were first born...mum in law knitted all sorts for them..then wen our 3rd son was 9months old..hubbys sis had baby girl..and our 3 were dropped like hotcakes....i found it disgusting...and it hurt me and annoyed me for a while...mainly cos i could see the look of hurt and disbelief on my kids faces...their grandad used to take hubbys sisters kids to shops and they wud come back with sweets etc...mine were sat there..cos they didnt want to go to shops with grandad...and he didnt bring ours anything back...and my poor kids faces...I'll never forgive them for doing wot they did...but I got over it..cos now we havent seen them for about 10yrs....hubby has no contact either...still keep in touch with his sis periodically...but not close to her...and now I have this from my own dad with myself and my kids....especially one of my boys...my dad has never 'liked' our 3rd son...cos he was a pain in the butt...my dad thinks the answer is to give him a good hiding..and cos we didnt..he took an instant dislike to him...and our son knows this and now he has no contact with my dad...which is a shame really...but thats life isnt it....it still hurts me..a bit..but am learning to live with it...my parents are elderly now and in need of a lot of care..they chose to ask my sis for this..even tho i offered and have been offering for the last 2-3yrs..they took her up on her offer...couple of weeks ago she was taken into hospital...guess who they came onto for help...yep...me...and like a fool i did it..then wen she came outta hosp...they dropped me again..and went back to her...i love my parents dearly...but have had my eyes opened this last few years to them...sounds awful that dont it..but its how i feel...i couldnt do to my kids what my parents have done to me and my kids...and i have just suddenly realised that i dont need anyone else but my hubby..and for those of you on here who prob know me...that i have been writin for advice about me and hubby...well we been married for 26yrs now..and its taken till the last month for me to see hubby in a different light...with everything kickin off with my parents etc...this last couple of months..he has changed towards me too....and now were really close...we have a different relationship now...that sounds ridiculous doesnt it..but its true....theres somethin different with both of us...its as tho a piece of a jigsaw has just fitted into place....they say things happen for a reason..and i believe that...and i think thats wots happened to us...parents doin wot they have..well my dad not mom...brought hubby and I closer together...were stronger with regards to the kids too...which is a good thing...I just wish we could have found each other a long long time ago...all those yrs we've bn married and now after 26yrs...its like first bein married....its terrific...lol lol...sorry gone off the subject here a bit havent I...sorry....ok..rant over...lol
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strange grabdparents
8 June 2009, 7:34 PM
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pippa
Joined 13 May 2009
47 posts
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Your ALL better off without them! just make sure history doesnt repeat its self with your kids and the favouriteism doesnt happens all over again when THEY get older. just make sure your kids know that you love them twice as much to compensate there "grandparents" obvious stupidity!
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i WILL start the diet tomorrow but...?
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strange grabdparents
9 June 2009, 4:25 PM
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Nobby
Joined 26 Feb 2007
6188 posts
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omg PC, yeah my dad does that too..his new girlfriend's grandchild was over one day and she sat there and ate a whole pack of sausage rolls..and we'd just been swimming,but had no money to get food afterwards and they didnt even offer my kids one - that little fat pig ate em all, and i could see how hungry my 2 were. That is unforgivable init.
They got married recently and we werent even invited, and as for looking after them when they are old - well, my dad was abusive to us as kids and my mum finally left him a few years ago..rest of the family (8kids!) wouldnt have anythign to do with him but he needed looking after so i faced the previous abuse, put myself up for more and moved in with him. My marriage almost fell apart coz of that, and he promised my kids when he got remarried that they'd be his bridesmaids to say thank you for all i'd done - as it was, we werent even invited! He even invited the scraggy neighbour and her kid - but not us! The reason? the boy calls him grampy..yeah, so do my two, because he IS their grampy!! Not anymore, i've cut all ties now. My kids will not be controlled in such an emotionally abusive way anymore. Grrr!
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Love me..Love my animals! :-p
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strange grabdparents
10 June 2009, 7:09 PM
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pc
Joined 6 Nov 2007
259 posts
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Nobby..isnt it surprising how many people have problems with their families? You think at the time its only happenin to you..but it isnt is it...still doesnt stop the hurt tho does it...you sound as if you have a nice dad too...lol...what we have done to them to deserve the abuse etc from them I do not know....and I have tried many times to think of a reason why I am treated the way I am..as I guess you must have too...and the rest of them with problems with their families...but I can never find an answer...its as tho I keep reproachin myself as if I have done somethin wrong for the way they treat me...but I havent...so now have come to the conclusion...to stuff em...lol...look after yourself for a change...get on with yr own life for once...but I suppose if its in yr nature to care...then its in you isnt it...takes a long time to get it out of you...if you ever can...been trying long enough..and not managed it yet...I live in hope...lol
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strange grabdparents
11 June 2009, 6:02 PM
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Nobby
Joined 26 Feb 2007
6188 posts
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do u know, you are so right - almost had a nervous breakdown going over wot i do to attract these people into my life (and it seems alot of the people around me find out i was a victim as a child then see it as their main aim in life to bring me down, themselves..!!)
I do go through a stages of blaming myself and wondering if it really is just me? (that was one of my dad's favourite things, making me mega paranoid saying its just me being ultra sensitive about people, rather than admitting that they too were abusing me as well!) Unfortunately its something which has stuck with me through life..but now i say Feck'em all! lol
Anyone treats me badly, they do it once and they're gone. I have zero tolerance nowadays, family or not. Hubby says im really harsh, but its my self-preservation and im doing ok on it so far! :o)
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Love me..Love my animals! :-p
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strange grabdparents
5 July 2009, 3:02 AM
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DY
Joined 11 Jun 2009
30 posts
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WOW - I'm not alone!!!
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strange grabdparents
5 July 2009, 5:47 PM
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pippa
Joined 13 May 2009
47 posts
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No, DY your never alone when u click onto preloved there is always someone out there who knows what it feels like eh guys?
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i WILL start the diet tomorrow but...?
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strange grabdparents
5 July 2009, 6:52 PM
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Nobby
Joined 26 Feb 2007
6188 posts
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lol Too Right! :o)
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Love me..Love my animals! :-p
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strange grabdparents
13 July 2009, 4:48 PM
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danielle
Joined 9 Jan 2007
1180 posts
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i have 2 sisters and 3 and 2 cusions all girls and 1 boy who lives in spain. me and my sisters if we got gift it was a 50p job from the bootfair were as my cusions would get new things and much better. both my aunt and uncals are better off than my dad. when i was 3 i was sitting at my nans and her dog came in the room and attacked me scaring my face the dog had a bad leg no one who about probly why attacked. but the dog was not put to sleep untill 2/3 months later when it bit my nan 30 years on she still blames me for having her dog put down. my nan flys to spain every year but she did not go to my younger sisters wedding because she said it was to far (real truth is she was mad because my sister had argued with my uncal) do dance on her grave be the bigger person and pretend she never exsisted.
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i wish i could help it, but i cant.
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strange grabdparents
14 July 2009, 11:39 AM
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pippa
Joined 13 May 2009
47 posts
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yeah , your right why should i give either of them the satisfation eh? 2/3 months it should have been shot that night!! so it was fine to do it to you but not to your gran thats really is double standards!! no offence but your gran sounds that sour SHE probably killed of the dog with one bite anyway!!
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i WILL start the diet tomorrow but...?
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strange grabdparents
14 July 2009, 11:54 AM
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pippa
Joined 13 May 2009
47 posts
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On a completely different subject where does everyone come from on this page? i have been wondering for a while just out of curiosity. I'm in cumbria and its not to bad weather wise today which make a change!!
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i WILL start the diet tomorrow but...?
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strange grabdparents
14 July 2009, 1:21 PM
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danielle
Joined 9 Jan 2007
1180 posts
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we have nothing to do with her now iv been trying for years but my sisters wedding tipped it over the edge.
im in essex weather muggy. no sun but warm
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i wish i could help it, but i cant.
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strange grabdparents
14 July 2009, 1:49 PM
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Nobby
Joined 26 Feb 2007
6188 posts
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Im in Devon. And its peeeeeeeing it down, jst to make a change..!! lol
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Love me..Love my animals! :-p
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strange grabdparents
14 July 2009, 3:07 PM
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pippa
Joined 13 May 2009
47 posts
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essex and devon .Lovely! never been to either but they always looked nice places to go on "Wish you were here!" I have always thought they were very expensive places to live aswell apart from london of course. well it has gotten sunny and clammy up here hope that doesn't rub it in too much!
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i WILL start the diet tomorrow but...?
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strange grabdparents
14 July 2009, 5:56 PM
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danielle
Joined 9 Jan 2007
1180 posts
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bits f essex is ok but most just ruf. good shopping been told its cheaper to shop here than any were else in the country. love my lakeside. kent next door always attractive
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i wish i could help it, but i cant.
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